What's with the shoddy police work in Pine Valley? Why do all of the cops just walk away from the people they're supposed to have in custody? No wonder Police Chief is always so exasperated!
Tuesday 8/4:
Remember how Kendall didn’t want to run away? Well, she did it anyway, because Zach told her to. I wish he’d stop bossing her around, because his plans are always AWFUL! Kendall tries to sail away with one of her sailing sailor friends with a boat . . . and she gets caught. Note to self: heels are never a good choice when you’re fleeing the country.
Tad shows up at Confusion to hit on Blondie in public and make her uncomfortable in front of his ex, and naturally, he spills the beans (kinda) 'bout that baby back home. Dr. David Baby Stealer overhears or something, because he spends all his non-baby stealing time at courthouses and bars. I’d like to state for the record I really like “Casual” Dr. David Baby Stealer, rather than “Business” Dr. David Baby Stealer. He looks so lovely in his leather jackets.
Yadda yadda Grandad wants Scott and CrazAnnie to all be roommates but Annie has to pretend she’s gay because otherwise The Ropers will kick them out. J.R. is super duper bummed about this whole CrazAnnie not being in jail thing, because not only is she not in jail, she’s not not doin' it with his father! Oh, oh, oh and then Grandad (who I have now dubbed "Captain Fire Hazard." Yeesh, ‘nuff candles, Grandad?) proposes to CrazAnnie. Meanwhile, J.R. totes bought a bottle of brown liquor (his fave!) but then smashed it (that’s what I call “alcohol abuse”) and has some sort of fainting/heart attack/vapors spell. Really it’s just that a teeny part of his soul is dying because his father is going to marry a psychotic lady who’s 80 years his junior. It's a reverse "Back to the Future" kinda thing.
Kendall’s thrown in the slammer (officially) and she confesses for the hundredth time. How many times is this woman going to confess? Did the first 99 not take?
So tomorrow, J.R. collapses and this week somebody gets shot and I bet Kendall confesses again.
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